I’m not sure what to do. There appears to be? no food left? in the house.

I just finished the last container of? Cool Whip and attempted to wash it down with some diluted Clover Honey. Yuck. Cooking Wine = Even Worse!

The only other food has white fuzz on it which I’m pretty sure is a bad sign. Even the dog won’t eat it. He’s hungry too. ?

Why doesn’t? Survivorman? cover these kinds of situations?

What would the Man versus Wild Guy Do?

Maybe I need to cut the dog open, eat him and use his carcass as a shelter to stay warm?

He’s not very big though….

….it’s either that or go to the grocery store….

HERE BOY!

I’ve decided to start? fasting. Eating just makes too much of a mess.? ?

I tried recruiting the help of my dog. Nada. More evidence that dogs are worthless. He just sat in the sink giving me “the look.” Dogowners everywhere can surely appreciate the “I’m Not Amused” look that you come to know and love.?

Well, time to go shop for expensive sporting goods that I don’t have time to use. Sure feels nice to collect that stuff and have it sit in the garage. Or maybe I should try to find another steal on a car to adorn the driveway?

My wife has a fondness for taking pictures of my underwear and posting them online. She views my dirty underwear as an inconvenience when she is trying to clean the house.

I view? them as art.

Warhol Ridgebacks Enhanced

Why watch American Idol when you can watch my underwear? (I particularly like this piece as the workout moisture gives off an eery glow at the impact point. If you look closely, you’ll notice that Paula likes this too.)

What fun would it be if the only remaining dog didn’t participate? Look how happy he is!

Finally, I present “Dinner for Ridgebacks.”

Enjoy this one while it lasts. I have a feeling my wife will blow a gasket and pull this one down for sure….

As some of you may know, my wife and children left today to go to a dog show in Utah (PARTY – DEPRAVITY!). This means that she has no control over this blog for the next couple of days. This also means that I am left at home alone. Sure, I miss them already…..but I also get to do guy things, such as:

go on a run without chasing my son? on a bicycle (or pulling him when he gets tired)

watch old Clint Eastwood films instead of American Idol

and, perhaps most importantly, drink beer