messy husband

Posted by houndrat on Monday Jan 28, 2008 Under husbands

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I have a great husband.? Really, he’s wonderful—super supportive, quick to send me on a mom’s night out, etc, etc.? He’s also a great father.? He loves to spend time with the munchkins, and rarely complains.

But, he does come with one minor glitch.? He’s a slob.? Which in and of itself, wouldn’t be so bad, but the thing is—he doesn’t think he’s a slob.? Oh, he knows he’s messy, but he thinks it’s the garden-variety type messiness.? Not the full-blown slobdom that it truly is.

What are the criteria for massive slovenliness, you might ask?? Well, here are a few of mine.

1)? Cuts hair, and leaves it in the sink for over 3 days.? Extra points if the? sink in question is the downstairs guest bathroom (it is).

2)? Cannot find the trash can to save his life, even though, to the best of my knowledge,? the trash has? resided in the same spot since we moved in over two years ago.

Exhibit A:? Is this where you put your ice cream box once the contents have been devoured?? I think not.

Exhibit B:? Trash from the lunch I brought home on Sunday.? I don’t know, maybe he thinks it’s a nice decorating touch—-bag lady chic, perhaps?

3)? Throws dirty clothes in the most convenient location, which is typically the floor.? Extra points when they are dripping wet and muddy (they are).

? 4)? Piling? a table? with assorted crap, and then leaving it there until I remove it.? Extra points if table was freshly cleaned (it was).

What he doesn’t believe (yet) is that I spend so much time tidying up his messes throughout the house, I have a scarcity of time left to actually clean anything, in the true sense of the word.

I’m hoping by keeping a photo-blog of his daily disasters, he might actually a) realize he’s far, far? beyond your basic messy husband and b) learn to use the garbage can.

Honey, are you reading this?

Share on Facebook
Tags : , , , | 3 comments

Where, oh where, did my sick days go?

Posted by houndrat on Wednesday Jan 16, 2008 Under family life

Well, it finally happened.? I officially have the flu.?

I mean, it wasn’t like I had a shot in hell of circumventing it, what with my son tossing his snot rags to and fro throughout the house, and my husband? “borrowing” my toothbrush (isn’t it a universally known fact that a toothbrush is the one item you don’t share, even in a marriage?? I mean, really, it goes beyond the laws of all common decency).? Of? course, since histoothbrush was mangled beyond repair by the Ferger Berger, I guess his options were limited.?

Given that our house? at this point is probably one? enormous petri dish of flu virus, I probably stood less chance of getting sick than? if I’d mainlined the stuff.

By now, you’re probably asking–is there a point to this pathetic tail?? ? In fact, there is.? The point is that? this situation leads me to decry yet another indignity foisted upon the stay-at-home mom.? ? What I want to know is, where are? our sick days??

I mean, come on.? Every one else I know gets to call in sick.? The butcher.? The baker.? The candle-stick maker.? Heck, even the candle-stick maker’s dog walker can call in sick.? My husband just? took two sick days himself.? Of course, now that I’m on the down and out, he’s back at work, leaving me with two kids and three dogs, when my head feels like it just exploded and was sewn back together with fishing line.? Without anesthesia? (Been there, done that, during my homebirth—except it wasn’t exactly my head getting sewn together drug-free.)

The fact is, there is no calling in sick when you’re a stay-at-home mom.? And I think we should protest.? Unite as one.? Rock the vote, or something to that effect.? At the very least, we need to fire our human resources specialist.? Because, let’s face it–some of our perks (or lack thereof) suck.

I know, I know—look who’s whining now?

Share on Facebook
Tags : , , , | 1 comment