Teaser Tuesday….Now That’s a Haircut!
Posted by houndrat on Tuesday May 25, 2010 Under writing, Young AdultOMG, I’ve been such a blog slacker lately! I think the pre-sub stress is getting to me (but hey, by the time I actually go on sub, I should be broken in, right? 
In the meantime, I’ve put in about 14k on a new WIP–which is not this one. I’m contrary like that. This is a snip from an older WIP that’s gathering dust at the moment. Hope you enjoy! (P.S. I swear, I started this novel prior to getting my awesome agent, who is named Taylor like my extremely messed up MC–EEEEK! Sorry, Taylor!)
“Although, you can’t blame them for being jealous. You really do have amazing hair.” He tugs on a strand, letting it slide between his fingers until it falls back into place.
Your hair is amazing, Taylor. You’re so lucky–I wish mine was long and wavy like yours.
Lainey’s voice, filling my ears. Lainey’s fingers, running through my hair the same way.
I stumble back as anxiety claws its way up into my throat, dimming my surroundings. My hair. I can still feel her fingers tugging it, separating it into sections for a braid. I used to love having people play with my hair. Now, I feel like something heavy is trying to suffocate my head, like the strands brushing my neck are trying to choke me. I can’t take it. I can’t—
“I’ve got to go,” I blurt, before scooping up my backpack and dashing for the door. I don’t wait to see what he says, but sprint for the bathroom. Please be empty, please, please.
I burst in, heart hammering, worrying half the school chose this very moment to take a pee break. Luckily there’s no one inside. The panic is nearly drowning me now. I yank at my hair until tears spring to my eyes. Keep yanking, but it won’t come off. I hate it. People see my hair and think they know me. They don’t. Those stupid blond strands aren’t me, not anymore.
I wish mine was long and wavy like yours.
I stare at my reflection blindly. Then, I dig frantically through my backpack for my knife.
The relief hits the second my fingers touch the cold metal, but it’s short-lived. Get it off, I have to get it off. I yank a strand taut with the other hand and start sawing away.
A huge chunk of blond floats to the floor. Followed by another. And another. Once I start, I can’t stop. It’s amazing how every butchered piece releases a little of that rib-grinding pressure from my chest, eases the solidified feeling in my lungs. Pretty soon, the entire floor is littered with hair. It looks like someone buzzed a fucking Golden Retriever in here. I don’t stop, though. I don’t stop until every last strand is gone—and I can finally breathe again.
Pirates...
May 25th, 2010 at 9:43 am
You seriously need to blow the dust off this, missus.
I just love the way you immediately put the reader in the narrator’s head. This is great stuff.
May 25th, 2010 at 9:44 am
Oh, Deb. That’s heart wrenching. Excellent!!
May 25th, 2010 at 9:46 am
Really fantastic job. My heart was racing along with hers as she cut her hair off!
May 25th, 2010 at 9:49 am
you definitely need to take this out of the trunk and wipe the dust off! very harsh and riveting
May 25th, 2010 at 10:10 am
Agreed, de-trunking ftw! I love the MC, her voice seems really different and engaging. Plus I totally want to know more about what’s going on
May 25th, 2010 at 10:35 am
Ooh, very intense – awesome scene!
May 25th, 2010 at 10:36 am
I love it! It’s so, so good!
May 25th, 2010 at 11:44 am
This is so awesome. I really felt the tension, and I wanted to know what had happened to lead up to her having this little breakdown of sorts.
May 25th, 2010 at 12:23 pm
OMG, the Golden Retriever line was genius. I love the intensity here. Definitely makes me want to read on
May 25th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
OMG I have to know what this is all about. This is so so good. Blow off the dust and get to work on this woman!
May 25th, 2010 at 3:44 pm
You know I love your writing, and this is no exception. So much emotion in this, I love it!
May 25th, 2010 at 5:02 pm
This is so heartbreaking and intense. Fabulous, as always!
May 25th, 2010 at 5:53 pm
HOLY CRAP, DEB.
holy crap.
this was AWESOME.
May 25th, 2010 at 6:12 pm
Oh WOW. *pats own hair* I can’t imagine… This is such an intense and awesome scene.
May 25th, 2010 at 6:37 pm
Awesome. So powerful and emotional! You gotta detrunk this!
May 25th, 2010 at 6:41 pm
What a great showing of emotion. I love how desperately she needs to cut her hair and the feelings and memories throughout.
May 25th, 2010 at 7:09 pm
Love the emotion and realism in this. I really enjoy the way you know how to draw vivid character images – get on with this
May 25th, 2010 at 10:30 pm
Yeah, I have no idea what was going on prior to this to make her feel this way, but can still relate and I love the writing and the voice. Awesome job.
May 26th, 2010 at 4:14 am
Very emotional and intense, although she does strike me as a little cuckoo cutting her hair like that. Lol I wonder what people will say when she comes out of the bathroom
May 26th, 2010 at 8:41 am
Thanks everyone!
Oh and Akin—she’s beyond a “little” cuckoo at times, so YAY! 