Ridgeback Pool Tables – Dogs Needed

Posted by Scott Driza on Saturday May 24, 2008 Under dogs, husbands

While peacefully sleeping and dreaming last night (no children or snoring wife), I contemplated the beloved Rhodesian Ridgeback…

[First - a little personal philosophy]

I strongly advocate putting resources to their highest and best use.? Some people see a rainforest, I see a Tom Fazio golf course with free Lemurs? for a hole in one. (No one really likes Lemurs anyway.)

Lemurs

Anyway………so, I’m laying in bed and? a great idea? hit me. Ridgebacks don’t really like the whole dog show thing. It’s expensive, wastes gas and causes unnecessary stress for all involved. So, what is the highest and best use of a Ridgeback? I momentarily thought of a fur coat. Sure, they’d be expensive (profitable) but so many other animals are already used for fur coats. It’s simply not novel.

Ridgeback Fur Coat

Clearly, the Ridgeback was put on this earth for a reason. That reason is billiards (pool)! Although, I’m not a billiards fan, it’s absurdly obvious that the best use for a Ridgeback is as a pool table cover.

Their fur is so short. So supple…… (resilient too – maybe some ScotchGuard?)

Why use felt when Ridgeback is so much more elegant? All the best homes should have a Ridgeback pool table. I’ve contacted Better Homes and Gardens. Here are the rough plans.

1. Take one Rhodesian Ridgeback between 4-6 years of age (fully grown, but not yet discolored by age).

Rhodesian Ridgeback

2. Mark the appropriate sections to discard.

Sections of a Rhodesian Ridgeback

3. Get rid of the waste product.

Rhodesian Pieces

4. Find a proper size pool table.

Pool Table Before Covering

5. Apply Ridgeback Fur and Voila!

Ridgeback Pool Table

Okay, maybe I have too much time on my hands with them being out of town. Maybe it is time for some Charles Bronson movies…..

Share on Facebook

2 Responses to “Ridgeback Pool Tables – Dogs Needed”

  1. IdentityMixed Says:

    I use mine to make sure my couch does not drift away. 240 pounds of dog while the humans sit on the floor. Makes perfect sense.

  2. Julie Says:

    lmao!

Leave a Reply

CommentLuv badge